AKC Eukanuba National Dog Championship

Loving watching this today while I try to get my house and my work in order.  The fact that there are dogs on the planet and that they’re all so darned awesomely awesome is enough for me to believe in a higher power.

The dog show is fun for me — I love to see breeds I’ve known and loved get some recognition  (Bouviers?  Yes!  Clumber Spaniels?  I’d like to have a dozen!)  But, I’m also a fan of of the dog whose breed can’t be named.  My best friend ever, Louis, was a who-knows, and Russell Jenkins is seriously a frankenstein dog — legs from a bulldog, teeth from a nightmare, good eye of a spaniel, ghost eye from something bad that someone did to him, and obscenely curled tail straight off of a piglet.  It all works somehow.

My love for mutts notwithstanding, I would love if there were an opportunity for Russell Jenkins to get into a dog show.

If he's that cute asleep ... imagine the beauty of him in the ring.
If he’s that cute asleep … imagine the beauty of him in the ring.

I think it’d be great for the announcers to have to run this script:

Male Announcer:  “Here’s a terrier mix, with an interesting underbite and legs so bowed it’s amazing he can walk that fast — just look at him pulling on the leash.”

Female Announcer:  “That’s right, and, let’s not forget that stunning ghost eye where his right eyeball should be.  A remarkable specimen.  And see that?  He’s just peed on the judge’s foot as if he owned it.  Truly a winner.”

Male Announcer:  “He’s handled by Jennifer Cox who prefers to be called Princess Happy Times Candy Pants, and his name is Russell Jenkins.  He’s got a good gait, that one, and that tail is just … well, it’s curled up like a spring.  Amazing that it’s natural, hmm?  It’s really something else, isn’t it, Janet?”

[I think Janet  is a good name for the female announcer?]

Plus, Russell Jenkins is a way better name than Bobo or Cash or Casper!

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