Shut up, already

For the second time in as many months someone — whom I was trying to agree with in a meeting today– told me to shut it. Was just trying to get a word (of encouragement!) in edgewise because mansplaining was happening and … Well, yuck, and I thought we could move the conversation forward if I just said “Yes, man.”

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And it got me a’thinkin’ again (that’s how we talk in the south. We also pronounce X’s where there are none in words like especially and espresso. Come visit, y’all!)  I take a lesson here because fool me once … You know the rest.

So, I did some yoga tonight and a bit on the bike and 20 whole minutes of meditation where I did my level best not to imagine a word battle with the condescender and just focus on the outcome I want, which is freedom and joy and hope again. And, it seems to have worked. Yay, hippies!  You all know what’s up. Clear eyes, heart and head. Hands working on the stuff that matters as much as the stuff that needs doing, and fully relaxing into acquiescence, agreeability and keeping mouth shut beyond saying, “Okay, sure” for the next little while.

I am already painted with the ABW brush and can’t change that, but I can leave it right there with Kermit and his Lipton and move on for me. Knowing where and when to fight for change is as important as fighting for it, so, bloop, got it. I am calming the f down on first shift so I am freed up to cultivate joy and purpose and connection on the night shift.

I think it’s going to work, at least in terms of getting through the first shift on the daily. Sisyphus has a great story, but I don’t want to make it mine!  Tomorrow is going to be a great day!  It’s Little Friday Eve!!

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